Why You Need To Get Rid Of Bad Company

By Nate Steere  AskMen.com

If you’re trying to get ahead and improve yourself, you’ve taken steps to set yourself up for success. You’ve gotten in shape (mentally and physically), you’re working hard on yourself, and you’re reading books and articles with information you need. If you’re trying to make improvements, great work — most people try to get ahead by blaming their problems on their environment, and don’t take any of the blame for why they’re stuck in a rut.

However, there are ways your environment can drag you down — look at the people around you. If the people you’re friends with, or associate with at work, are a negative influence, guess what? You’re being influenced, whether you’re aware of it or not. Now, any of your friends can have a bad patch, and being there to pick them up when they’re down is part of friendship. But we’re talking about that other friend — the one whose idea of fun is always getting wasted, who can never chip in on the bill and always has a crisis they need help cleaning up. You ignore their calls, and the one time you do pick up feels like one too many. If you’re like most guys, you don’t seek out the company of these people, but when they initiate a meet-up, you tend to accommodate. It’s easy to say and hard to do, but here are four compelling reasons you need to cut ties.

They are shaping your attitude

Jim Rohn is a self-help author who famously said: “You are the average of the five people you spend the most time with.” Your attitude, the way you look at the world, is influenced by who you spend time with. Think about it: Your worldview is shaped by the things you see and experience in the world. The way you invest your time in people and activities shapes the man you become. That’s why it’s so important for guys to travel, to see new things and expand their horizons. On the flip side, if you spend your time in a smoky bar, listening to somebody complain about how their job sucks, their boss sucks, their love life sucks, and there’s never enough money, it’s going to rub off on you. Do you leave these sessions feeling charged and ready to take on the world? No, they juice you up with negative energy and teach you to look at your life like a victim. That’s just a bad attitude — we’ve all had friends who get into too many fights, trouble with the law, drugs, and worse. You grow to fit your environment, so make sure your environment breeds excellence and positivity.

They are derailing you from your goals

Have you ever been driving home from work, with the plan to cook dinner, clean up around the house, throw in a load of laundry, exercise, save a cat that’s stuck in a tree, solve the Middle Eastern situation, read for a while, then work a little more on your plan to go into business for yourself? Then your phone rings with your buddies telling you to meet them at the bar. You tell yourself “I’ll do all that stuff tomorrow…,” and the next thing you recall is your alarm waking you up in the morning. Listen, plans change, and one of the best parts of being an adult is that you get to make responsible decisions about your life. You can eat pretty much whatever you want to for dinner. Feel like grabbing a DVD tonight? Go for it. And if the offer to do something fun comes along, by all means, rearrange your schedule and have a good time.

Here’s the hitch. When people constantly pull you away from those other areas of your life, it can cause you to become unbalanced. If you’re not achieving your personal goals, you need to balance it out — and your friends should be supportive of that. If taking a pass for the night causes them to tease you, or worse, make fun of your other goals, take a look at that. Granted, good friends bust balls left and right, but they truly want to see you succeed. Toxic friends, on the other hand, are afraid of seeing you succeed, as a reminder how they’re not succeeding in their own lives. If your friends aren’t respectful of your dreams and ambitions, they won’t respect the time you devote to those pursuits, and they’ll try and get you to come to the bar instead.

They’re costing you money

Have another look at the Jim Rohn quote in the first tip. This is outstanding advice in all aspects of friendship, but it’s especially true when it comes to the area of personal finance. Another speaker, Randy Gage, adapted this quote to read, “You earn the average of the salaries of the five people you spend the most time with.” More excellent advice! You’re reading this article, so you’re the kind of person who recognizes wisdom when he sees it. Then again, go ahead and prove Gage right: Grab a piece of paper, list the names of the five people you spend the most time with (a total of five from your work and personal life, typically), write down their approximate salaries (it’s always less than they lead you to believe), add ’em up, and divide by five. This will probably be very close to what you earn. So, what’s the lesson? If you want more money, hang out with rich people? Not at all. Success in business is related to drive, hard work, persistence, and a hundred other qualities. High earners bring value to their companies and are rewarded for it. Their outer reality reflects their inner reality. Thus, hang out around people who give value to their companies. They’re much more likely to give value to their friends as well.

You’re hurting them

OK, so if none of the above arguments have influenced you at all, what about this one? By being accepting of the company of toxic people, you’re not just hurting yourself, you’re hurting them. Ouch! But it’s true; by being available to hang out and hear all of your friends’ problems, you are allowing them to continue in their negativity. If they have a sympathetic ear and a cold beer on hand to deal with their sorrow, they’re going to continue using negativity as a path through life. Problems are meant to challenge us, to make us grow by rising to the occasion. It’s not always easy, but the true path around a problem is through it: stepping up, manning up and solving what needs to be solved. By always being sympathetic when your friends complain, you’re allowing them to be beat by the problems in their lives. That’s right: Now you’re the one being a bad friend.

Being a good man

Hopefully, these points have convinced you to stop spending time and energy on the toxic people in your life. But, also don’t get confused about the point here. Everyone has ups and downs, and the time will come where your true friends need somebody to listen, a shoulder to cry on or even some real help. None of that makes your friend a negative person. You can tell the difference between somebody having a bad day, bad month or even a bad year, versus a person who is in the dumps because they are choosing to be. So don’t abandon your friends — friendship is one of the very best parts of life. And don’t tolerate the people who use you as a crutch — you’ll end up smelling like an armpit. 

Pretty Is as Pretty Does

By Miranda Hitti
WebMD Health News

Reviewed by Louise Chang, MD

To be more physically attractive to the opposite sex, you may want to give your personality a makeover.

A new study states that “personality goes a long way toward determining your attractiveness; it can even change people’s impressions of how good looking you are.”

The study included 78 college students at a northeastern U.S. university.

First, they watched a computer screen display 36 facial photos of members of the opposite sex.

The students rated the physical attractiveness of the people in the photos on a scale of 1 (extremely unattractive) to 10 (extremely attractive).

Next, the students were asked to count down from a large number by sevens and then up by 13s.

That task was all about distracting them before they saw the photos again. As the photos reappeared, the students heard about each person’s personality.

Some were described as being honest, humorous, mature, intelligent, polite, and helpful. Others were called abusive, offensive, unstable, cruel, unfair, and rude.

Lastly, the students repeated their physical attractiveness ratings and noted whether they wanted to befriend or date the people in the photos.

Personality rocked the results.

People who looked good lost ground if they had nasty personalities. And those in the middle of the pack or further down on the looks scale benefited from an admirable personality.

Likewise, people weren’t keen to date or befriend the beautiful but cruel. Instead, they’d rather spend time with someone with a better personality.

The results were a bit stronger for women. But “personality was of great importance to both genders,” write the researchers.

They included Gary Lewandowski Jr., PhD, assistant professor of psychology at Monmouth University in New Jersey.

Single students and students in romantic relationships both connected physical attractiveness and personality.

The bottom line: “While it may still be important to be physically attractive, it is also important to convey a desirable personality,” write the researchers.

They add that “these findings are particularly encouraging as cosmetic surgery becomes increasingly common.”

Their study appears in the scholarly journal Personal Relationships.

Confessions: Addicted to Internet Dating

WebMD Commentary from “Marie Claire” Magazine

By Christopher Farah

I waited until she closed the bathroom door.

Click. That meant two full minutes until she came out — two full minutes for me to grab my computer, check my online dating profile, and — inevitably, guiltily — slam my laptop shut just as she snuggled up next to me on the sofa.

What was I doing? Just days earlier I had been ready, even eager, to take my profile down for good. After almost a year of searching and scouring every Website in Los Angeles for the perfect match, I had — I thought — finally found her: the One for Me. OFM had it all: intelligence with a streak of creativity, the ability not just to hear but to listen, a searing sense of humor with a tang of sarcasm, and a really great rack. We started seeing each other regularly — quickly moving from making out in my car to doing much more in my bedroom — and talked on the phone every day. Everything was perfect.

Except for this: I still checked my profile once, twice, three times a day. Even when she spent the night. I was an addict, and my drug was online dating.

At first I tried to rationalize my behavior. What’s the harm in doing a little casual “people watching,” right? Like being at a café or a park. And who doesn’t wonder every now and then if maybe they could do a little better than their current mate?

But this was different. On the Internet, I had an actual catalog of available women, listed with their quirks, characteristics, and measurements. Finding someone better was no longer innocent curiosity; it was easy — and it became an obsession. Yes, OFM listened, but what if someone else listened better? True, OFM was smart, but couldn’t I find someone smarter? And fine, OFM had a really, really great rack, but don’t flat-chested women also have a lot to offer?

Soon, looking became winking, winking became hot-listing, hot-listing became e-mailing, and e-mailing became seeing other people. I never found out if OFM knew. Unlike me, she stopped checking her profile soon after we met. There was no official breakup; I just didn’t return calls as quickly, started canceling dates with her so I could try out new potential matches, and eventually we drifted apart. With so many new “opportunities” out there — with the illusion that a life-changing upgrade was just a click away — I couldn’t maintain my focus on our relationship.

That was a year ago. I’ve dated many women since. None of them has quite lived up to OFM…but there’s someone better out there, right? I’m sure of it.

Set The Scene For Unforgettable Sex

via AskMen.com

In a relationship, it’s sometimes easy to put sex in the proverbial backseat of your life; especially when work, bills, eating, sleeping, and all that other unsexy stuff comes into play.

So, today’s tip is for those guys who want to reignite the passion — or for the guys who simply want that look of amazement from their women after a night of bang-on sex.

Here’s how you can set the scene for unforgettable sex.

Rent a room
The great thing about renting a hotel room is that you don’t have to worry about destroying the sheets with chocolate syrup, nor will you care if you yell and scream, because you’ll likely never see your “neighbors” again.

Of course, you don’t have to rent a room if you think it’s too expensive. You can always pimp your own room instead.

Either way, you have to set the room up for sex. Get the proper lighting (candles or red lights), proper music (something ambient), sexual props (blindfolds, tethers, etc.), and other add-ons.

Send her an invite & an outfit
Send her a written invitation, along with a box that contains one hell of an outfit for her to wear (think of your most favorite fantasy vixen and go with that). Something short and black usually works well if characters aren’t your thing. Lace and satin look great on any skin tone and will make her feel super sexy.

Get the right food
To enhance the mood, make sure the room is stocked with the necessities. Buy chilled champagne (or other liquor) and strawberries (or other fruit — already sliced), chocolate, water, and so on, so that you’re both comfortable.

Don’t head straight to the main event when you set the scene for unforgettable sex.

Take her out first
Don’t head straight to the room when you meet up. You need a buildup, something that’ll make her want to take you somewhere private. If she’s adventurous and open-minded, take her to a strip club and get her a lap dance.

If that’s not her thing, then opt to take her dancing. If you hate dancing, then encourage her to dance for you while you stand at the bar and watch. Don’t get hammered and don’t get her hammered, otherwise the evening will be a total waste and, instead of sex, it’ll involve a toilet bowl and a very foul stench.

The idea is to get yourselves revved up for what’s in store once you’re alone and naked.

Pack her overnight bag
This applies only if you’ve opted to rent a room or don’t live together. Head to the pharmacy and invest in some toothpaste, toothbrushes, hair products, and anything else you think she’ll need for the morning after.

Break the sexual monotony
If your girl is used to having sex in a certain fashion, shake things up a bit by doing things differently tonight. If you usually take on a missionary stance, then try doggy style. If foreplay usually involves nothing more than kissing, this time bring your penis up to her mouth and let her kiss it instead.

Go down on her and while you’re licking her clitoris, put your fingers inside her and search for that G-spot. And dude, take your time: you’ve got all night.

Kiss her, touch her in places she’s not used to being touched, and let her appreciate your body as well. Play games, move to other parts of the room (or house) and introduce a whole new you to your girl.

keep it interesting

You don’t really have to spend money to ensure great sex, but every once in a while, if you make her feel like gold, she’ll want to show you how much she wants you — in a physical way. And nothing makes a woman hornier than knowing you think she’s incredibly sexy. 

I Want To Be An Avatar

The movie Avatar is a pretty bad ass movie. But as always with semi science-fiction movies there´re people who take it a little bit to seriously. Take this girl, she wants to pay her respect to the people of Pandora, so she paints herself blue. But then again who am I to judge? See for yourself. 

Hypnotist vs Police Officer

This guy is trying to get a cop chasing him by burning headlights and doubling the speed limit. When the cop pulls him over, he uses several techniques that hypnotists have been using for decades. He’s able to bring so much confusion to the cop so that he can actually turn the tables, ask the cop for some directions and drive away.

Man vs Woman: Anal Sex

via Muffslap.com

Thoughts on Anal Sex

She Said:

Proceed with caution and be sure permission to come aboard was granted. If I were to add up the number of my friends who won’t consider anal sex an option to the number who enjoy it, I’d have a 70/30 ratio. Most women just aren’t comfortable with it. They think there is a perfectly fine hole next door, why would he need to use that one? What many women don’t understand is that anal sex offers a whole different sensation to a man. For men it is a feeling of conquest, which is a huge turn on. For the woman who isn’t one hundred percent into it, she could be feeling overwhelmed emotionally by the domination of the act. More than just the conquest and domination aspect of it, it offers a totally different sexual sensation. It is generally a tighter and drier feeling for the man and many women swear that it creates far more intense orgasms. Essentially, it depends on the comfort level of both parties with the act. Don’t go poking around without talking about it first.

He Said:

Variety is the spice of life. Anal sex is certainly a great addition to any bedroom relationship. Let’s face it, if you are having sex in the same positions over and over, even sex can become boring. Anal sex is certainly a conquest to a guy if he can successfully convince his partner to engage in backdoor activities. Anal Sex is a little bit more risky and can usually lead to a guy feeling his partner is more adventurous in the bed room; possibly even opening the door to other requests. The true great challenge for a man is how to bring up this topic. There is always the casual conversation with your partner to try to find out what she is willing to do. Most women appreciate the conversation and are more likely to try it if you speak about it first and also get some lubrication to help in the conquest. There are even lubrications that will actually numb the back door if your partner is scared of the pain. The back door is something most guys want to do, but are usually scared to bring up. So guys, if you want to engage in these activities, have a conversation with your partner rather than sticking a finger in her backdoor and waiting for a reaction. This will ensure that you don’t shock her with your sneak attack and that you will be better prepared with the proper lubrications if you two decide to take the plunge.

Last Resort Booty Calls

via muffslap.com

Every NFL quarterback has a progression of check down options when his primary receiver isn’t available. He looks for his first option, second, and so on. Just like a quarterback, guys have a progression list for their late night booty call. When a guy strikes out at the bar, and doesn’t want to wake up alone, he turns to his options. The average guy has about 10, but if you’re Christian Troy from Niptuck, your options can be upward of 20. Text with caution.

Option 1. The Current Booty Call

This woman is always your first option and knows the routine. Hopefully she’s awake, available, and in the mood.

Option 2. The New Girl

Send a quick text to see if she’s still awake and possibly drunk enough to make a bad decision. If you really like this girl, and want the relationship to be more than a booty call, don’t text her when you’re hammered.

Option 3. The Old Booty Call

She hasn’t been around much, but there’s be no harm in sending a text and seeing if she would still be game.

Option 4. The Ex

Always a dangerous but quick “what are you up to” text. You’ll end up at her house with a nice wrestle session under the sheets. Unfortunately, you’ll have to pay for in the morning with pointless relationship talk.

Option 5. The Attractive Neighbor

This girls in in walking distance, but you haven’t hooked up with her, yet. If you think she’s around, send a flirty text asking if she wants to “watch a movie,” we all know what this is code for.

Option 6. The Recently Single Old Ex

This ex has been out of the text rotation for quite some time, but sending a quick “how you been” could never hurt. She’s recently single, extremely vulnerable, and easily to take advantage of since you already have the established rapport. Be her shoulder to cry on for an hour, and reap the benefits.

Option 7. The Out of Town Girl

You only see this girl when she’s in town to see friends, family, or business. Send a quick text to see when she’ll be in town next, and setup a friendly booty call.

Option 8. The Freak

She’s not the most attractive girl, but definitely makes up for it in the bedroom. With enough cocktails and no response from your other options, she’ll do for the night. We refer to this girl to as the 2-6er, you only see her between 2am and 6am.

Option 9. The Friend

You always have that attractive friend, who never has a boyfriend, but you have never hooked up with. If you’re desperate, why not send a text and see what happens. If she’s a real friend, she’ll forgive you the next day.

Option 10. The Mass Text

You send the general “Hey what are you up?” mass text to a dozen or so girls in your phone hoping to get a response and go from there.

If the progression list runs its course with no response, then it looks like you are waking up alone.

Bikini Skiing and Snowboarding

With the skiing and snowboarding season underway in most parts of the country, we thought it would be a great time to take a deeper look at the timeless art of bikini skiing and snowboarding. Though often a rare site on the mountain, especially on the east coast, these ski bunnies can be found in select mountain towns throughout the western part of the United States. So, if you haven’t made it out to your local mountain yet, here is some easy motivation.

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