The Sweetest Kiss
By: Kristen R. Stephens DivineCaroline.com
I still can’t decide which was better: the way he kissed me or the way he looked at me.
I’m not sure how it even started. We were just standing in the kitchen and before I knew it, my back was pressed against the countertop’s edge, his arms around me, his lips kissing mine, tentatively at first, then more passionately later, but never forceful.
His hands didn’t wander like the hands of men before him or the way the hands of men to come would. They rubbed my back, and occasionally they found their way into my hair. He was respectful and soft, yet still sexy and strong.
Every once in a while, we’d stop for a few seconds and look at each other. Not in the sickeningly-sweet-romantic way, or the I-can’t-wait-to-rip-your-clothes-off way. It was more a mixture of curiosity and surprise. I had no idea I was even attracted to you, my eyes must have said. Me either, his said back. But now we know and we’re wasting time, so let’s get back to it. But not before he smiled at me—the sexiest, sweetest, most beautiful smile that had ever been intended solely for me. I could feel my heart trying to pound out of my chest. I smiled back at him and we both laughed.
Something happened when we kissed. It sounds crazy, but we seemed to get each other without even really knowing each other. Or maybe it was just that we came together when were at exactly the same place. Looking back on it now, maybe that’s what brought us together.
It would be years later before I understood the place I was in that night. (Why does hindsight make us so smart?) My self-esteem had taken a beating in my two previous relationships and though I didn’t know it at the time, those relationships were the beginning of an abusive dating pattern that would last for years. Carrying all that history around had made me a little fragile. I didn’t trust anyone, and I wasn’t sure I would ever find anyone who could deal with all my flaws.
So when we took another kissing hiatus and he stared at me as if I was the most beautiful woman he’d ever seen, my stomach did flips. No one had ever looked at me like that before. I didn’t get it. I didn’t even know him. But we seemed to understand each other on so many levels. I felt like maybe he had his own history and that helped him identify and understand mine. And he was okay with just kissing me. He wasn’t pushing for more; he wasn’t trying to hustle me back to his house to see how far he could get with me.
We went on like that for maybe fifteen minutes, kissing, staring, smiling, and laughing. Then we heard footsteps coming into the kitchen and we remembered we weren’t alone. We pulled away from each other and reality came crashing back in. It was late and people were going home. We said goodbye, careful not to do anything that might give us away to the others. As he walked out the door, he turned and gave me that amazing smile again, but it was even better now because it held a secret that only the two of us knew. I waved to him and said good-bye.
I never saw him again.
But to this day, that was still the sweetest, sexiest kiss I’ve ever had. I like thinking about it every now and then and wondering where he is. It gives me a little hope of what—and who—might be out there for me.
Everyone Else is Cheating—So Why Aren’t You?
Spitzer, Edwards, Sanford, Letterman. Not since Clinton rolled a Cuban in Lewinsky has our country so gorged itself on the scurrilous details of extramarital dalliances. Thousand-dollar hookers. The predilection for doing it “raw.” The secret love child. The back entrances at the Beverly Hills Hilton. Those e-mails about “magnificently gentle kisses” and “tan lines.” It’s as if some evil scientist had activated a microchip in all of us that made us behave like goats. One click, one maniacal cackle, and Gomorrah is upon us.
As a nation, we did our part in each instance by exhibiting the requisite outrage and disgust. We devoted airtime and newsprint to lengthy discussions about the libido of the powerful male, his insatiable appetite and subconscious propensity for self-destruction. We wanted answers. We wanted justice. Most of all, we wanted to believe that this was the exception and not the rule—when, in fact, everyone from the club-prowling playboy to the Similac-smeared Dad of the Year is prone to—likely even wired for—this behavior.
What none of us want to consider when we get to that “forsaking all others” clause in our marriage vows is that infidelity is more common than obesity in this country. According to a recent University of Washington study, 28 percent of men will cheat on their wives at some point in their lives. By comparison, only 25 percent of Americans qualify as fat, according to a 2008 report by the Centers for Disease Control. And when you lower the stakes, adultery seems to become even more attractive: 74 percent of men say they’d have an affair if they knew they’d never get caught, reports InfidelityFacts.com. Somewhere between “I do” and “Be sure to leave the light on,” we became the men we said we would never be—the kind who kiss their wives good night and then fantasize about the redhead who was on the next elliptical that morning. We’ve spawned a cottage industry with our bad behavior: from private investigators and reality-TV shows dedicated to nailing the cheaters to AA-style support groups, weekend retreats, and crisis centers committed to healing the victims.
“A lot of people are coming to terms with the unnaturalness of monogamy,” says David P. Barash, coauthor of Strange Bedfellows: The Surprising Connection Between Evolution, Sex and Monogamy. “But there’s a difference between the public persona—what we like to think of each other—and what we all know goes on.” Barash, a zoologist and psychologist, has spent years debunking the notion that we have it within ourselves to remain faithful for long stretches of time. Turns out it’s just as unnatural for man as it is for almost any other member of the animal kingdom. One notable exception is Diplozoon paradoxum, a tiny parasitic worm that inhabits the intestines of fish and mates for life—but really, what are your options in there? Continue reading…
21 Ways to Say “I Love You” Without Saying a Word
WebMD Feature from “Redbook” Magazine
By Sara Anderson
You already know it’s important for you and your guy to tell each other “I love you” — as often as possible. But you shouldn’t depend on those three little words to let your one-and-only know what’s in your heart. In fact, nonverbal displays of affection are often a better way to get through to the man in your life. “Guys tend to be action-oriented, so they feel less comfortable using words to express emotions,” says REDBOOK Love Network expert and psychiatrist Scott Haltzman, M.D., author of The Secrets of Happily Married Men. “They’ve seen enough Tom Hanks movies to know they’re supposed to always say ‘I love you,’ but they’re not sure that words alone convey how they feel.”
Ready to let what you do speak louder than what you say? We asked REDBOOK readers and the men in their lives to share some sweet ideas. Plus, we added in some expert tips on how to give your love a boost without uttering a word.
“Sometimes I ‘write’ a love message on my husband’s breakfast toast. Using cookie cutters, especially my Valentine’s Day set of hearts, I press one lightly into a slice of bread, just hard enough to imprint it, then I toast it. It never fails to bring a smile to his face.” —Anita Crehan, Mason, NH
ROMANCE, REVISITED
“Every now and then I leave a card saying how much I love and appreciate him under his pillow for him to find before he goes to sleep.” —Cim Collins, Springfield, IL
“My wife, Leigh Anne, sometimes has to travel for work, and when she gets home, I give her a small gift for every day she has been gone. I’ll set them on the kitchen table and wait for her to notice them — things like her favorite perfume, fresh flowers, or a cool piece of hand-made jewelry. I love to spoil her!” —John Montgomery, Birmingham, AL
“I place special little love notes, cartoons, jokes, or small articles — sometimes racy ones — in her underwear drawer. She never knows what to expect next. She gets a big kick out of them and knows it is my way of saying I love her.” —Joe Cirillo Jr., Englewood, FL
“When I take a shower at night, I write messages on the fogged-up mirrors so they appear when he takes a shower in the morning before he goes to work.” —Jackie Peirce, Oley, PA
MAKE LIFE A LITTLE EASIER
“My husband puts toothpaste on my toothbrush and leaves it lying on the sink for me every night before bed. He is the sweetest husband ever!” —Lisa Wilkes-North, Heath, TX
“I scour the TV listings for his favorite movies or a sporting event that I know he’d love to watch. I TiVo it without telling him, then surprise him with it on Saturday morning. Bonus: While he’s on the couch, I’ve just bought myself some me-time. Manicure, pedicure, here I come!” —Cindy Panowicz, Grand Island, NE Continue reading…
Olympic Track Star Removes Breast Implants To Improve Speed
via weirdnews.com
Olympics or bust?
Olympics, apparently.
Australian star hurdler Jana Pittman-Rawlinson recently reversed her $13,000 breast implant surgery, worried that her newly acquired chest was affecting her performance on the track.
“Every time I raced I panicked about whether I was letting my country down, all for my own vanity,” she said.
Pittman-Rawlinson thinks that the weight and heft of her new cleavage is causing added drag on her speed, and that ditching them will make her more aerodynamic.
Look, breast implants make a lot of women feel more confident — but if a beautiful, successful world champion athlete and Olympian doesn’t feel confident in her body, that doesn’t really bode well. Especially considering the fact that Pittman-Rawlinson told reporters that she wouldn’t rule out getting new implants after her track career is over.
If nothing else, maybe we can admire her commitment to the cause? “I absolutely loved having bigger boobs, but I don’t want to short-change Australia either,” she said. “I want to feel the most athletic I can, to know that I’m standing on the track in London (2012 Olympics) the fittest I can be.”
After all, downsizing your chest for the citizens of your country is patriotism at its finest, if you ask us.
Is Your Fear Of Rejection Holding You Back?
via AskMen.com
I could never understand how some men have no fear of fighting, parachuting, bungee jumping, mountain climbing, and even going to war in times of need. Yet, when it comes to approaching women, their jaws lock and their knees start to wobble.
What is it about a woman that makes some of the strongest and courageous men freeze in their tracks? Is there some kind of chill in the air? Do women have some kind of secret weapon that makes us tongue-tied in their presence? Of course not; men are just too proud to risk rejection.
The big fear
The main reason most men panic when they approach women is their fear of rejection. This is a very natural preoccupation, as it is human nature to fear the unknown or, at the very least, the inexperience of making first contact with women.
So why is it that today’s men don’t practice as much as their forefathers? Probably because there is a lot more pressure for a man to succeed, as well as repercussions if he doesn’t.
Over the past three decades, women have become more independent, liberated and are no longer afraid of making demands. And if these demands are not met, most women won’t hesitate to move on to the next best thing (whatever that may be). This has left a lot of men feeling confused and lost as to how to approach a woman without scaring her off.
Too much pressure?
Most men believe that they’re expected to make the perfect first move; you’re expected to do it respectfully, gracefully, yet not too aggressively, otherwise you’ll be labeled a pervert, a pig or even be accused of sexual harassment. This pressure, in turn, has grown into a great monster, which leads a lot of men to avoid the hassle altogether.
Most of the shy men I’ve encountered have the same grievance: “I’d like to meet more women. But I’m scared of being rejected. Today’s women are too eager to hit the ‘reject’ trigger because they assume that any man who approaches them is a pervert.”
Overcome your fear of rejection. Begin by learning how to play the mating game… I could never understand how some men have no fear of fighting, parachuting, bungee jumping, mountain climbing, and even going to war in times of need. Yet, when it comes to approaching women, their jaws lock and their knees start to wobble.
What is it about a woman that makes some of the strongest and courageous men freeze in their tracks? Is there some kind of chill in the air? Do women have some kind of secret weapon that makes us tongue-tied in their presence? Of course not; men are just too proud to risk rejection.
The big fear
The main reason most men panic when they approach women is their fear of rejection. This is a very natural preoccupation, as it is human nature to fear the unknown or, at the very least, the inexperience of making first contact with women.
So why is it that today’s men don’t practice as much as their forefathers? Probably because there is a lot more pressure for a man to succeed, as well as repercussions if he doesn’t.
Over the past three decades, women have become more independent, liberated and are no longer afraid of making demands. And if these demands are not met, most women won’t hesitate to move on to the next best thing (whatever that may be). This has left a lot of men feeling confused and lost as to how to approach a woman without scaring her off.
Too much pressure?
Most men believe that they’re expected to make the perfect first move; you’re expected to do it respectfully, gracefully, yet not too aggressively, otherwise you’ll be labeled a pervert, a pig or even be accused of sexual harassment. This pressure, in turn, has grown into a great monster, which leads a lot of men to avoid the hassle altogether.
Most of the shy men I’ve encountered have the same grievance: “I’d like to meet more women. But I’m scared of being rejected. Today’s women are too eager to hit the ‘reject’ trigger because they assume that any man who approaches them is a pervert.”
Overcome your fear of rejection. Begin by learning how to play the mating game…
Used Coffins Turn To Coffin Couches
Can you believe that these coffin couches were made from used coffins that collected from funeral homes? I was thinking these coffin couches were inspired by the coffin but I never expected they are “recycled” from real and used coffins.
We at Coffin Couches have the mindset of thinking “Green” and we know it is different but we strongly believe in recycling. Our niche happens to be 18 gauge steel coffins which we collected from local funeral homes primarily in Southern California. It is a health and safety law that funeral homes cannot resell used coffins to the general public. We approached funeral directors with the attitude of recycling. These coffins are not used for burial due to slight cosmetic inconsistencies. They are reconfigured and modified resulting in a finished product – a unique one a kind coffin couch. If you notice (although it may be too small) the six cast iron heavy duty legs are embossed with the universal biohazard insignia. The reason we utilize this sign is because safety is our utmost concern. If you are not aware, once a human body is placed in a coffin it is considered biohazard tissue. The legs have the embossed insignia for precautionary reasons in the event body fluids are exchanged on these coffins. Perhaps you would feel safe knowing that you are in designated biohazard scene!
Human Skull Linked to Yale Secret Society to Be Sold
A human skull that apparently was turned into a ballot box for Yale’s mysterious Skull and Bones society is going on the auction block.
Christie’s estimates the skull will sell for $10,000 to $20,000 when it is auctioned on Jan. 22. Fittingly, the auction house has agreed to keep the seller’s name a secret. On Monday, it described the person only as a European art collector.
The skull is fitted with a hinged flap and is believed to have been used during voting at the famous society’s meetings. The auction house said it also may have been displayed at the society’s tomblike headquarters on Yale’s campus in New Haven, Conn., during the late 1800s.
Skull and Bones, an elite society founded in 1832, has closely guarded its members’ names and its activities since the early 1970s. Prior to that time, the group published an annual roster.
Publicly known members, known as Bonesmen, include President William Howard Taft, both presidents Bush, Massachusetts Sen. John Kerry, businessman and diplomat Averell Harriman, publisher Henry Luce and author and commentator William F. Buckley Jr.
“I think it’s a macabre artifact,” Margot Rosenberg, heard of Christie’s American decorative arts department, said Tuesday. “It’s an intriguing story tied to America, tied to Yale. I think it will generate interest for people who are former Bonesmen, people who collect Americana, people who are interested in history.”
The skull is believed to have been owned by Edward T. Owen, who graduated Yale in 1872 and went to become professor of French and linguistics at the University of Wisconsin. The word THOR is etched into the skull; it may have been the nickname given to Owen or another society member.
The skull is being sold with a black book, inscribed with Owen’s name, the year 1872 and the numeral 322, a reference to the society’s year of inception and to the death of the orator Demosthenes in 322 B.C. It contains the names and photographs of about 50 Bonesmen, including Taft, who became the 27th president of the United States; Morrison Remick Waite, who became U.S. chief justice in 1874; and William Maxwell Evarts, who served as U.S. secretary of state and U.S. attorney general.
Skull and Bones invites 15 Yale seniors to join each year. Bonesmen swear an oath of secrecy about the group and its strange rituals, which include initiation rites such as confessing sexual secrets and kissing a skull.
On Tuesday, the society’s secrecy remained intact. Efforts to reach a society member or a representative of its business arm, the Russell Trust Association, through a Yale spokesman were unsuccessful. The Ivy League school, which is not affiliated with the society, did not return a reporter’s call.
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